(no subject)

Because of the widespread complaining of my joints if I move suddenly or to the fullest range of motion, plus the dryness of my mouth, eyes and sinuses, I am beginning to suspect that I may have Sjogrens Syndrome. Basically my body might be drying out and stiffening. The thyroid problems I'm having are often linked to Sjogrens, and can be medicated, but for the syndrome itself, there's just symptom management. I am chewing a lot of gum and using a lot of eye drops.

What worries me, though, is that since my hands and feet are so much more sore and complaining when the joints are flexed, is that I will eventually not be able to do my job. But if I give up massage then what? I have some ideas of stuff I can do like making ASMR videos and lotion bars and homemade bath products. But I have uncertainty, and it is going to be a lot of paperwork starting my own business.

Brian and I would be okay financially, I know, but if I did nothing I would feel useless and bored. And just. No.