flamingsword (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
flamingsword) wrote2005-09-25 10:34 pm
flamingsword) wrote2005-09-25 10:34 pm
stuff
I'm inexplicably sad. Just have been sort of wistful and soul-achy for the last half an hour and don't know why. Sometimes I still get feeling like some part of me a long way off is in trouble or pain, and I just can't reach the obvious answer as to where this other me is through all the noise. It's irritating, is what it is.
People have expressed concern over my recent questioning of my faults and assets, and it's just something I have to do every once in a great while. No need for alarm or praise, just checking up with how I am as compared to how I used to be. Maybe I should write down some of what I used to be like, so that those of you who have never been emotionally disturbed will just nod and accept my random status check as a necessary thing. I really did use to be a basketcase, y'all. But it was a long time ago, and only![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
insanitys_pup remembers.
I don't think I'm brave in the way that it takes to be a writer. Not of fantasy, at any rate. Writing about real life and the things I go through is like dancing - one form of information comes in and another form goes out, simple as you please. It's largely automatic. But an act of shared fantasy is letting someone wander around in your private garden and having to field questions about your choice of paving, layout, and the construction of your arbors. I'm not up for that. I'll writeozonelayercake his H/G femmeslash Christmas present and that's probably that for me and writing fiction. I can beta, I can edit like nobody's business, but I can't make myself open my creative processes up to other people. To those of you who were interested, sorry.
People have expressed concern over my recent questioning of my faults and assets, and it's just something I have to do every once in a great while. No need for alarm or praise, just checking up with how I am as compared to how I used to be. Maybe I should write down some of what I used to be like, so that those of you who have never been emotionally disturbed will just nod and accept my random status check as a necessary thing. I really did use to be a basketcase, y'all. But it was a long time ago, and only
insanitys_pup remembers. I don't think I'm brave in the way that it takes to be a writer. Not of fantasy, at any rate. Writing about real life and the things I go through is like dancing - one form of information comes in and another form goes out, simple as you please. It's largely automatic. But an act of shared fantasy is letting someone wander around in your private garden and having to field questions about your choice of paving, layout, and the construction of your arbors. I'm not up for that. I'll write
ozonelayercake his H/G femmeslash Christmas present and that's probably that for me and writing fiction. I can beta, I can edit like nobody's business, but I can't make myself open my creative processes up to other people. To those of you who were interested, sorry.