Since sensitive and sometimes privileged information could be referenced in these entries, make use of the privacy functions, and even if you have to keep a post privacy locked for your eyes only, it still counts as journalling. If you feel the need to state such delicate situations vaguely for privacy reasons, any friend will understand, and any non-friend can be encouraged to mind their business. -- for your relationship --
1. Name ALL of the feelings you have for each other. The good and the bad: you can't start dealing with your feelings until you admit that you have them, and naming them will start that process. If you have to use a list of feelings
to get the ball rolling, then so be it. Do you only feel certain feelings in certain situations? Write it out or make a note to write more about it later.
2. Set some short term and long term goals for your relationship. List achievable steps to those goals.
3. List problems that your relationship has had. How did you solve those problems? What concessions were made by each side? Is this an equitable balance? How would you like to solve problems in the future?
4. What do you trust about your partner? What are their reliable traits? List their strengths and dependable qualities.
5. Think about your parents relationship. Compare and contrast your relationship with theirs. Are there positive traits that you are trying to replicate? Are there negative traits that you are reproducing without intending to?
6. Write two love letters
. The first is to yourself.
7. How does your relationship make you a better person? What aspects of yourself has your relationship inspired you to change? How has your relationship grown with you and your partner as people?
8. Anger shows us what is important to us. What do your arguments reveal about what you and your partner prioritize? Evaluate your priorities to make sure that you are not still working with an outdated understanding of yourself. What has changed in your priorities, that you need to talk over with your partner? -- General Skill Building --
A. What is a conversation that you have been putting off having? Plan the conversation using respect, honesty, and gentleness.
B. Listen to your self-talk. What do you tell yourself when you experience negative emotions? Name your coping skills, both positive and negative, and list your methods of self-avoidance.
C. Recall times you have achieved a flow state
. Are there some commonalities in the circumstances? How can flow be encouraged
in your life?
D. Name your fears. Name the things you believe about yourself and the world that make you feel vulnerable.
E. What are things that make you feel trapped? What relieves that feeling? When do you feel free?
F. How does your body respond to your emotions? Describe the physical sensations of your emotional reactions.
G. How are you betrayed by your expectations? When you do not get what you expect out of an interaction, what about that difference is upsetting to you?
H. List your methods of self-care. What soothes you in times of difficulty?
I. Refer to the list of your fears. Pick one. List the efforts you have undertaken to guard against that fear. List the hopes you have given up on in order to avoid this fear coming to pass. Evaluate the usefulness of this fear based on this cost-benefit analysis.